Therapy Used to be Female-Deficit… Now Male Deficit

Historically the field was patriarchal. Male therapists were known to call husbands to share the work going on with the wife. Women were hysterical, too emotional, etc. Time has advanced and now we have flipped the script. It’s casually easy to say that men who show up are “on the spectrum” because they don’t speak the therapy language or are “narcissistic” because they are insensitive to their wife’s needs. Any deficit approach undermines potentially viable relationships where people fell in love with each other as the people they are, warts and all.