Couples therapy is often a delicate dance, with therapists navigating the complexities of two individuals’ lives intertwining. However, a common misstep in this dance is the premature separation of couples therapy into individual therapy. Elizabeth Doherty Thomas, co-founder of the Doherty Relationship Institute, sheds light on this critical issue that has plagued the field for decades.
Discerning the Need for Individual Therapy
When therapists hastily conclude that one or both partners require individual therapy instead of couples therapy, they risk overlooking the relational dynamics at play. While individual issues certainly merit attention, prematurely diverting attention away from the couple’s shared goals can hinder progress and potentially exacerbate existing conflicts.
Bill Doherty, a seasoned couples therapist with a career spanning over four decades, emphasizes the importance of discerning when individual therapy is truly necessary. Supplemental individual therapy may be beneficial in cases where one partner identifies a personal issue that impedes their ability to fully engage in couples therapy. However, this should not detract from the primary focus of improving the couple’s relationship dynamics.
The danger arises when therapists hastily conclude that both partners require individual therapy before adequately exploring the relational issues at hand. By doing so, therapists risk sending a message of hopelessness to the couple, implying that their relationship is beyond repair without addressing the root causes of their discord.
Importance of Prioritizing Couple’s Goals
At the Doherty Relationship Institute, therapists advocate for a balanced approach that prioritizes the couple’s therapeutic journey while addressing individual concerns within the context of the relationship. Rather than viewing individual therapy as a panacea for relational issues, therapists strive to integrate both modalities to facilitate meaningful change within the couple dynamic.
Ultimately, the goal of couples therapy is to empower partners to navigate challenges together, fostering deeper understanding and connection. By reframing the narrative surrounding individual therapy within couples therapy, therapists can cultivate a more holistic approach that honors the unique needs of each partner while preserving the integrity of the relationship.
With The Doherty Approach, therapists advocate for a balanced approach that prioritizes the couple’s therapeutic journey while addressing individual concerns within the context of the relationship. By integrating both modalities, therapists facilitate meaningful change and foster deeper understanding and connection within the couple dynamic.